Seeing my friends from school reminds me of my capacity for love. It's not even so much who they are as who the allow me to be. I mean don't get me wrong, I LOVE these kids, but I love lots of people; what's so special about my Tuscaloosa friends is that just being around them makes me fall in love with the whole world all over again.
The thing about relationships (any kind, from friendships to romance) is that we are all inclined to depend on one another- which is good and bad. It's like leaning on someone: even if you're both supporting each other, neither of you is really able to move. So there should be people in our lives that we lean on, but those people should have someone else to lean on too. Maybe you could trace a huge support chain through the entire human race? But maybe not, because at home, I feel like the person on the very end, who is entirely able to stand on her own two feet.
Someone didn't get the memo that I have weak ankles. Had I not found the friends that I am now so blessed to have, I would've surely collapsed by now. It's really my fault; I wanted to be the stable one. I wanted to be the one who had her shit together, who never seemed phased or distressed. I wanted to be happy, heathly, and intellegent. And, I was.
I have this reoccuring nightmare where I'm at a banquet with everyone that I know, and I'm supposed to make a speech. Right before I'm supposed to go on stage I look down, and there's blood everywhere, and I can't figure out why. Then I realise that it's my blood. I never actually look to see where I'm wounded, because at this point I start to panic, and my greatest fear is that everyone will see that I can't give my speech any more. This is where I wake up or fade into another dream or something I guess, because I can't tell you how it ends. But I can tell you that if this nightmare were slightly altered, and I were in a room with only my Tuscaloosa friends, things would be much different. I don't have to have the dream to tell you what it would be like: I would realise that the blood was mine, only to look up and see that everyone in the room is bruised beyond repair. And then, in a weird dreamy kind of way, because everyone is hurt, no one is hurt. And then we probably fly away on a magic carpet or something.
Instead of metaphorically leaning on each other, we are in a great big metaphoric dog pile. Or maybe a metaphoric black hole, where we do nothing but continuously collapse on one another, and no one's quite sure how the whole thing even works.
The point is, my friends rule at life. I can't wait to get back to school.
P. S. Happy New Year, also, "deck" is my new favorite word. "Fin" is my second favorite word."Symphony" has been bumped down to number three.
The thing about relationships (any kind, from friendships to romance) is that we are all inclined to depend on one another- which is good and bad. It's like leaning on someone: even if you're both supporting each other, neither of you is really able to move. So there should be people in our lives that we lean on, but those people should have someone else to lean on too. Maybe you could trace a huge support chain through the entire human race? But maybe not, because at home, I feel like the person on the very end, who is entirely able to stand on her own two feet.
Someone didn't get the memo that I have weak ankles. Had I not found the friends that I am now so blessed to have, I would've surely collapsed by now. It's really my fault; I wanted to be the stable one. I wanted to be the one who had her shit together, who never seemed phased or distressed. I wanted to be happy, heathly, and intellegent. And, I was.
I have this reoccuring nightmare where I'm at a banquet with everyone that I know, and I'm supposed to make a speech. Right before I'm supposed to go on stage I look down, and there's blood everywhere, and I can't figure out why. Then I realise that it's my blood. I never actually look to see where I'm wounded, because at this point I start to panic, and my greatest fear is that everyone will see that I can't give my speech any more. This is where I wake up or fade into another dream or something I guess, because I can't tell you how it ends. But I can tell you that if this nightmare were slightly altered, and I were in a room with only my Tuscaloosa friends, things would be much different. I don't have to have the dream to tell you what it would be like: I would realise that the blood was mine, only to look up and see that everyone in the room is bruised beyond repair. And then, in a weird dreamy kind of way, because everyone is hurt, no one is hurt. And then we probably fly away on a magic carpet or something.
Instead of metaphorically leaning on each other, we are in a great big metaphoric dog pile. Or maybe a metaphoric black hole, where we do nothing but continuously collapse on one another, and no one's quite sure how the whole thing even works.
The point is, my friends rule at life. I can't wait to get back to school.
P. S. Happy New Year, also, "deck" is my new favorite word. "Fin" is my second favorite word."Symphony" has been bumped down to number three.
1 Comments:
Your posts entertain me to no end Empress.
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