And, I've decided that it's ridiculous to distance yourself from someone you love just because you are a silly girl who is indecisive and unrealistic.
Have your cake; have me, too. Haven't I, every step of the way, discouraged attachment and mandated indifference? Am I dumb for even thinking that I could maintain this kind of relationship without attachment, or is it particular to you?
I've been told, emphatically and repeatedly, by pretty much everyone who's opinion I value at all, that it is always always always a bad idea to be friends with benefits. And, I can't say I don't see where you're coming from, but, I wouldn't trade this.
And, is it even over? I mean, I think it ends when I'm not strong enough to keep it up, but isn't it going to hurt regardless? It could be my self-destruct chip, but one part of me is screaming that I shouldn't end this, but let it end on its own. And maybe it already has...?
The things about it is, every relationship that you ever enter into in your entire life will cause you pain. That's just true. You will either break up, or one of you will die, or you'll grow apart; I see no avenues where no one is hurt. At least in this situation, I'm not the victim.
I'm NOT the victim. Any pain that I feel, I brought on myself. Wow. You have no idea how incredible that is. I mean... That's freaking amazing. That's how things should be. I'm NOT the victim. AND, I'm not hurting anyone. There are no victims.
Oh wow, I think this is the coolest thing I've realized all semester. Sometimes things just hurt, and you're not the victim, and you're not inflicting pain. Is this major? I don't have to feel guilty. I don't have to feel pathetic. Is this not better than the past few painful situations I've been in?
I need to hug some people.
Have your cake; have me, too. Haven't I, every step of the way, discouraged attachment and mandated indifference? Am I dumb for even thinking that I could maintain this kind of relationship without attachment, or is it particular to you?
I've been told, emphatically and repeatedly, by pretty much everyone who's opinion I value at all, that it is always always always a bad idea to be friends with benefits. And, I can't say I don't see where you're coming from, but, I wouldn't trade this.
And, is it even over? I mean, I think it ends when I'm not strong enough to keep it up, but isn't it going to hurt regardless? It could be my self-destruct chip, but one part of me is screaming that I shouldn't end this, but let it end on its own. And maybe it already has...?
The things about it is, every relationship that you ever enter into in your entire life will cause you pain. That's just true. You will either break up, or one of you will die, or you'll grow apart; I see no avenues where no one is hurt. At least in this situation, I'm not the victim.
I'm NOT the victim. Any pain that I feel, I brought on myself. Wow. You have no idea how incredible that is. I mean... That's freaking amazing. That's how things should be. I'm NOT the victim. AND, I'm not hurting anyone. There are no victims.
Oh wow, I think this is the coolest thing I've realized all semester. Sometimes things just hurt, and you're not the victim, and you're not inflicting pain. Is this major? I don't have to feel guilty. I don't have to feel pathetic. Is this not better than the past few painful situations I've been in?
I need to hug some people.
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